Damnation...

Literally...i love this country really but darn Immigration is getting on my nerves. I handed in my work permit/visa application a month before its expiry date and found out today that if they don't process it by the expiry date, even if i am currently employed, i will have to stand down from my job for the duration it takes them to renew/extend my work permit. In other words, i'm not allowed to work if my work permit isn't valid. Now that makes sense but in my case, i sorted everything out as fast as i possibly could and now the ball is in their court. There is one way out of it though, if my current employer sends a letter informing them that the company cannot function without me and request urgency with regards to my work permit application. There's some statistics on the Immigration website that i find fairly amusing...For:

Work Permit
We will decide:

75% within 20 days

95% within 45 days

99% within 60 days

I want to pull my hair out...it is so frustrating!! Oh well..my boss is going to give them a ring after his meeting so hopefully i'll be a part of the 75% that gets considered within 20 days. Fingers crossed...

I got an email from my mum the other day asking if she could throw out my yearbooks from high school. Funnily enough, that period of my life was one of the worst ones but i felt a strong sense of nostalgia. Probably because while most of my time spent there was absolute hell, the bits of it that made it into the yearbook were the good parts. Choreographing and performing dances, winning speech competitions...I was telling Toby last night that i'm not quite sure how i made it through those times. I think now that i'm so much stronger than i was but at the time i didn't know what was in store, all i knew was what was around me and that was everyone telling me that i wouldn't make it...that i wasn't good enough. They use to tell me that i was such a show-off because i knew where i was going, i wasn't going to stick around in our hometown and they all thought that was the worse thing to wish for. I did what i said i wanted...i'm exactly where i want to be. No thank to any of those shits...I'm amazed that i managed to wake up everyday then and go to school and put up with all the abuse. Somehow i knew that i was made for other things...funny how with a little divine help even the worse possible circumstances are bearable...and you don't really notice it at the time, because if you did you wouldn't be able to cope. I notice it now though...i could have sunk into depression and probably tried suicide but those thoughts never even crossed my mind.

I think i was screwed up to some extent but isn't everyone? The point is to realize the problem and not take easy way out. It's the same with parents...i love mine with my heart and soul but i want to raise my kids a little differently than i was raised. Of couse, things like values and morals will be similar but i decided recently that i'm not going to smack my kids. I've always been a strong supporter of a light tap on the wrist actually...i can't believe that i'd ever think that was the right way to deal with kids but because most Malaysian kids grew up getting a smack every once and a while i figured it didn't hurt me so no biggie right? Now, in no way am i faulting my parents...they grew up in a different era and had a totally different upbringing to mine so they did what they thought was best. So i'm going to do that too...i decided that smacking my kids is basically telling them that violence is an okay punishment. It isn't...Some people think that giving a baby a smack is the easiet way to tell them not to do something but...it is also telling them at a very young age that pain will be inflicted by the one being that is their world at the moment. That's a disturbing thought...You train pets with treats so at the very least we could try that right? Hahaha...a lot of you would have heard me say when i was younger that i didn't want kids etc...i'm SO looking forward to having kids now. I'm scared too because this isn't the best world to be bringing them into but wouldn't it be awesome to be able to care for and pass your knowledge down to another being? Don't worry..i'm not pregnant and i still have quite a few things to achieve before i'm willing to go down that road but all i'm saying is...i'm excited. Hopefully as time goes by i'll get this excited about growing old..hahaha!

Ah..Not sure i can get anymore random than that...Hahaha...TGIF